My Sweet Escape.

Unspoken.

Thu, 29 Nov 2012 14:54:22 -0500

I have so much built up emotions right now, I have already gone through so much in this last year. & life just keeps throwing em at me. I guess that’s what I get for always being such a strong woman! They say GOD doesn’t give you things, that you can’t handle. and although I do believe that, I still don’t understand why I’m going through all that i’m going through. This is why I enjoy tumblr, It kind of feels like your talking to yourself, you have the freedom to post whatever is on your mind. It’s kind of like a journal. but better. Anyways, Lately i’ve been feeling so drained… I don’t even know what to do anymore. Man, I love my boyfriend so much. but sometimes he makes it so hard to stay with him. He has so much demands, and expectations from me, and sometimes i feel like he’s trying to mold me into someone i’m not. He thinks the things he asks of me are reasonable, but in all honesty, i think their ridiculous. It’s crazy what you do for love. I’m doing things that make ME unhappy, to make him happy! how does that work? how do i make sure i’m happy, and he is too. Is it possible to get that back? I’m starting to feel like it’s no longer possible. I’ve been trying for so long to make him happy, and get us back to where we use to be. but I feel like im working for nothing. Every day, theirs a new thing we fight about, or disagree on. The fights are getting worst. and the more it happens, the more its weighing on my heart. I try to leave, but i find it so hard… I know I don’t want anyone else in life. but I also don’t know how to stay.. I think a lot of it has to do with our engagement! of course that changed everything. We were engaged for a year, than one day he decided he no longer wanted that for us… how do you take a commitment away from someone you’ve been with for 2 years? I dont quite understand how you can do that to the person you love. that’s the kind of thing that you think about before you do it. So it doesn’t have to come to this, when this happened I lost a lot of my trust I had in him, I no longer felt secure with our love, and I pretty much felt like crap.. Finally when I get use to the fact that we are no longer engaged.. more problems arise, the fighting , the disagreements. It all just started to get to me even more. I can never talk to him or tell him how I feel, because he will just keep saying the opposite to everything I say, rather than actually listening and putting himself in my shoes.. Ive done everything for this kid . and it makes it harder each day that he treats me like this. Everyone thinks were fine, they think im the one whos a bitch. but they dont look deep enough to see where this attitude comes from. He pushed me this far. I didn’t ask for any of this. I have given him my time, love, and all my energy. and if this time around im still unhappy. I’m gonna be forced to leave. I can’t be someone im not , just to make another person happy. I should be enough, Flaws & All. when you love someone you dont ask them to fit this image you dreamed of. maybe i’m not the girl for you. maybe im not good enough to fit your expectations. but i know that no girl will love you like i do, no girl will put up with what ive been, no girl will take care of you how i have. That i know, I might not be perfect, but if my love isn’t enough. & you keep trying to make me into this perfect little person, if you keep feeling like your in jail. & you keep feeling depressed. Let me go…. set me free. Cos someone out there will love me for me .. That i know

If he doesn’t love you anymore. You just have to let it go… True love doesn’t walk...

Sun, 11 Mar 2012 00:19:37 -0500

If he doesn’t love you anymore. You just have to let it go… True love doesn’t walk away. .

I thought I could handle this like I always think I can. But it’s killing me, I literally feel...

Sun, 11 Mar 2012 00:18:00 -0500

I thought I could handle this like I always think I can. But it’s killing me, I literally feel my heart being stabbed over & over & over & over… I wish I had sleeping pills so i could at least get some sleep…. This is so akward.

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Thu, 16 Feb 2012 19:40:56 -0500

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Thu, 16 Feb 2012 19:39:19 -0500

I'm so sorry.

Tue, 10 Jan 2012 01:58:09 -0500

For depriving you of my thoughts tumblr. I missed you <3

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Wed, 23 Nov 2011 21:18:35 -0500

Everytime someone talks about you, isn’t because their jealous of you. Do you have to always...

Wed, 23 Nov 2011 21:16:15 -0500

Everytime someone talks about you, isn’t because their jealous of you. Do you have to always flatter yourself to boost your confidence & tell yourself that, Have you ever thought that maybe people really just don’t like you?

She acts like the shit she says is relevant. I can’t stand her ! I really never could....

Mon, 31 Oct 2011 00:22:38 -0400

She acts like the shit she says is relevant. I can’t stand her ! I really never could. Even since I was younger. I remember telling myself, I can’t wait till I turn 18 to get away from her & this house full of nut jobs (- my dad) & the funny thing is, she puts on this act in front of people like she’s perfect ms. daisy. Even in front of my boyfriend. & when he’s not around or anyone else. The fucking evil bitch demon comes out. I’m so sick of her, & everyone in this damnn house. I can’t wait to just have my own space.

Everything has been bothering me lately. Yet i still can’t find a way to say anything...

Mon, 31 Oct 2011 00:18:51 -0400

Everything has been bothering me lately. Yet i still can’t find a way to say anything that’s on my mind. Maybe cos it’s so jumbled up with different shit in it. I really wont be able to take this much longer….

Day 02 – Your first love.

Sun, 09 Oct 2011 20:06:04 -0400

The first person I thought I really loved turned out to be a figment of my imagination. People always say this when they find someone knew to date. But with me it’s different, any one who’s known me personally through the years all say they’ve NEVER seen me light up the way I do now. The feeling I get when i’m near him, & the warmth in my heart. He makes me a better person. Mitchell Christopher Simon, The boy I plan on marrying someday. My first TRUE TRUE love. Not that little kid love, the one where all it is is bickering & fighting. We fight alright, but we treat just about every situation like we’re grown ups. It’s just different with him & I Never had a feeling like this before, therefore. He’s my first TRUEEE love <3

I’d rock these on new years or 4th (;

Sun, 09 Oct 2011 19:59:04 -0400

I’d rock these on new years or 4th (;

We all had that One Ex.

Sun, 09 Oct 2011 19:54:57 -0400

ayyecynthiax3:

That one Ex that we thought would actually last. That one Ex that we would ditch our friends for. That ex that made us smile like an idiot. That ex that you wouldn’t want to say goodbye to. That ex that showed us “Forever” doesn’t exist. That ex that treated us like shit. That ex that we regret dating. That ex that you wished was never an ex. That Ex that showed us the example of what an ex looked like. & That one ex that taught us a Lesson.

thehillzarealive: amen

Sun, 09 Oct 2011 04:17:33 -0400

thehillzarealive:

amen

Listening to the birds chirpp outside my window, Leaves me feeling very peaceful & serene <3

Sat, 08 Oct 2011 18:17:00 -0400

Listening to the birds chirpp outside my window, Leaves me feeling very peaceful & serene <3

Day 01 – Introduce yourself.

Sat, 08 Oct 2011 18:12:00 -0400

Ello mate ` My name is Chante but I am known more likely by Tae (: I’m pretty un-predictable. I’m Sweet. Kind. Crazy. Fun. Jolly. Easily Angered kind of person. You Never know what your gonna get with me. If your nice I’m nice. If you’re a bitch, I’m a bigger bitch. It just varies I guess you can say(: I’d like to say i’m a very self determined person, I am very goal oriented & my future is what I work so hard for every day of my life. The future is the only thing that matters in my eyes. So I work hard every day to be able to achieve & have the life I’ve dreamed of having. I’m a neat freak. But my boyfrend makes it almost impossible for me to be that. Since he’s so Dang Messy. Anyways, I can’t really fully introduce myself through the internet. So if you want to get to know me more. Introduce yourself (:

Things Only Hawaiians Know:

Sat, 08 Oct 2011 17:37:18 -0400

1. Everyone older than you is “aunty” or “uncle”.

2. Don’t drive Saddle Road with pork in your car.

3. Dont whistle at night; the night marchers will find your ass.

4. “Haole”.

5. We make the best coffee. THE BEST.

6. We eat spam for dinner. JUST spam. Maybe with nori and rice.

7. But we eat rice with everything.

8. We can actually pronounce these words: kalanianaole, likelike, aiea.

9. Don’t go swimming in the Alawai.

10. Zippy’s Chili.

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Sat, 08 Oct 2011 17:35:42 -0400

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Sat, 08 Oct 2011 17:08:16 -0400

Oh. I love this girl <3

Sat, 08 Oct 2011 16:52:42 -0400

Oh. I love this girl <3